Archive for Learning Experiences

Cruising Towards Healing

CruisingOr “Lessons in Nothingness.”

Coming back from our honeymoon, where we spent an entire week on a cruise with the entire family, there is so much to say, and I barely know where to begin.

What an absolutely beautiful week! I was so busy having fun, I very nearly forgot about “the cancer”, for a while at least. What a treat to just breathe in the ocean air and relax on our balcony, watching the waves slap up against the side of the ship. I had forgotten how wonderful it is to just breathe.

Actually, in hindsight, it’s probably my inability to just stop and breathe for a while that caused my body to go out of whack like this. If I could do it over again, I would have taken more time to just relax over the years.

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Prepared For Tomorrow’s Mastectomy

MastectomyWell, we’re down to the wire, folks. For the past two weeks, I’ve been preparing myself for tomorrow’s surgery.

I’ve read more information about breast cancer in the past two weeks than I ever thought was possible to read. In fact, I’m pretty sure I could pass a medical exam on the subject by now…

I’ve surfed online for pictures of what a mastectomy looks like, to help shield myself from the absolute shock of seeing what it will look like. It ain’t pretty, but at least I know what I’m in for…

I’ve read countless survivor’s stories and have laughed and cried along with them…

I’ve read each and every comment and thoughts from friends and people I’ve never met, which has helped enormously. Man, I can’t tell you how good it is to know I’m not doing this alone…

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Some Days Are More Challenging

Breast Cancer DepressionIt’s been a few days since I’ve posted anything, primarily because I haven’t been feeling as well as usual (gee, wonder why?).

I debated sharing this publicly, and ultimately decided to go for it. See, this blog isn’t just about talking about how I stay hopeful and positive. It’s also my way of dealing with the challenges of going through this event in my life, and if I am to be completely healed, I need to also be completely raw and honest about everything I’m experiencing.

So, I am taking a few moments to just “let it all hang out” and let the chips fall where they may.

The last few days have taken their toll on me, both physically and mentally. It’s been more difficult than usual to maintain my smile. It hasn’t been impossible, just more challenging.

There are two reasons for this.
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Hair Today, Give Tomorrow

Shaving head for chemotherapy hair lossWell folks, since my last post, life has been a flurry of doctor’s appointments, tests, consultations, and getting informed and ready for the various treatments I will be going through in the coming months.

We knew I would need radiation, chemotherapy, and hormone treatments, but we needed all the myriad of tests to be completed to determine exactly what type of drugs they would be using in my specific case. And those test results are starting to trickle in, giving us more information about what to expect.

With bated breath, I’ve been waiting to find out whether the type of chemo drugs I will be receiving will result in early menopause, as well as losing all my hair. I fully expected this would be the case, but I didn’t want to go out and get my head shaved, only to find out that hair loss would not be an issue in my case. Wouldn’t that have been a cute joke for the universe to pull on me?

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I’ve Decided Not To Battle The Cancer

Lighting a candle for breast cancerSince this drama began for us, I have been utterly amazed at the outpouring of support, gifts, cards, letters, and love that has come our way.

It is honestly overwhelming, at times. See, in our lives and in our business, we’re used to being the “givers”. We have a family that we are used to giving our time, money and support to. In our business, we are “teachers”, and we’re quite accustomed to giving a great deal of our knowledge, time, resources and energy to help others.

So when this happened, we honestly did not expect so many people, many whom we have never met, to reach out this way and provide us with much needed support and caring, just when we need it the most.

Michel and I will be eternally grateful for it. You were there for us when we needed the most to know that we were loved. And I believe it has gone a long way to helping me get through the healing much faster.

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